FUNNY SPORTS QUOTES
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"You guys line up alphabetically by height."
  - Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach


"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
  - Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach


"I play football.  I'm not trying to be a professor.  The tests
don't seem to make sense to me, measuring your brain on stuff I
haven't been through in school."
  -Clemson recruit Ray Forsythe, who was ineligible as a freshman
because of academic requirements


"Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter?  He went to
prison for three years, not Princeton."
  -Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up again
   with promoter Don King


"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still
find my #%@# clothes."
 - Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he
   keeps a color photo of himself above his locker


"I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."
  - Shaquille O'Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon
  during his visit to Greece

"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."
  -Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh


"Nobody in football should be called a genius.  A genius is a
guy like Norman Einstein."
 - Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann